Friday, September 12, 2008
Introduction:
We here at Boys Town start with helping our boys and girls learn reverence for males and females. Reverence means treating sexuality as it should be treated according to its own beauty and truth in God’s plan. Once we understand what God’s plan is for human sexuality then we teach the skills and build the relationships necessary to carry it out. We do this because the more skills we learn in such important areas and the more healthy relationships of friendship we build we will not only be happier ourselves, but bring happiness to others and to our society.
1. The purpose of human sexuality
So we ask what’s the purpose of human sexuality in God’s plan? We know everything has a purpose and every person has a purpose built in by God.
The purpose of a watch is to tell time. You can use it to prop a window open, but that’s a misuse of the watch.
The purpose of a knife is to cut things. You can put it in a flowerpot so a flower grows straight, but that’s a misuse of the knife.
The purpose of a pencil or a pen is to write. You can use a pencil or a pen to stab other persons, but that’s not its purpose. That’s a misuse.
The purpose of a wastebasket is to hold things. You can use a wastebasket to beat someone over the head with, but that’s a misuse of the wastebasket.
The purpose of human beings is union with God and others in God.
Our destination is heaven. And the purpose of human sexuality is to help us get there. Its purpose is: unitive and procreative.
2. An apprenticeship in self-mastery
So growing as boys and girls into adolescence and adulthood is an apprenticeship in self-mastery. It’s a training in being the kind of person God wants us to be. It’s a training in human freedom and responsibility. (So you can say no to your impulses. In this way, you can become free and responsible.) Our choices are clear as every boy or girl knows.
On one hand, we can be in charge of our impulses, in charge of our dreams, in charge of our hopes and find joy and happiness.
Or we can let ourselves be dominated by our anger, our loneliness or our passion or what the media tells us to do. Then we become very unhappy.
If we learn (slowly but surely) not to believe all the lies the media tells us, not to be simply blind followers to our impulses or blind to what the music tells us, the movies and the hood tells us then we will be the kind of persons we have often dreamed of. Perhaps our families have told us we will never be that good and wonderful kind of person. Perhaps we don’t even believe in ourselves. But we at Boys Town believe it. And we’re here to help you believe it too.
3. Self-mastery is a process
Learning the skills for self-mastery is a long process and it’s time to begin when you are young.
We hear every day stories about kids who are mean and cruel and nasty to each other. We also hear stories every day where boys rip off girls (and vice versa) by sweet talking and sex is often used to do that ripping off of the other.
And perhaps some of our boys and girls come from backgrounds where that was very true in their past. But here at Boys Town we have to learn God’s purpose for our lives, God’s purpose for our being male and female and how to be friends: a source of goodness, a source of happiness, a source of joy.
We live in a culture that is obsessed with sexuality and that’s sort of sad because it is easy to get trapped into empty or hurting relationships which are not nourishing and which aren’t humanizing and which don’t help us. We need to build a capacity for friendship which is the whole basis for all success in marriage and families.
4. What does Scripture say
In Genesis we read: “God created man in his own image…male and female He created them.” He blessed them and said “Be fruitful and multiply.” “When God created man, he made him in the likeness of God. Male and female, He created them and blessed them.”
In creating us male and female, God gives man and woman an equal personal dignity. Both are created in the image and likeness of the person of God. The male images God in a male way. And the female images God in a female way.
When God created us, He created everything good. God joined together sexual love, no matter what, with pro-creation. That is clear as a bell. The word pro-creation means to “create on behalf of God.”
How do we create babies on behalf of God? By bringing forth children inside of marriage, namely, inside of love no matter what (faithful, permanent love).
5. The Covenant of Marriage and the Covenant of Redemption
In God’s plan, children are to come from a union of husband and wife in love no matter what.
This is the unitive and pro-creative purposes of marriage.
In this way, children have the best chance to grow up healthy and happy and everyone admits that.
This is called the covenant of creation. (God’s commitment to continue the human race: God’s command to only create children in a union of love no matter what.)
There is also the covenant of redemption (God’s commitment to take away our sins, give us grace to fulfill the mission God has set us on and open heaven to us).
This is the covenant of Jesus being exclusively faithful, sacrificial and loving us no matter what on the cross so we could fulfill our mission and enter heaven.
That’s the sacrificial faithful love of husband and wife.
St. Paul tells us that sexual intercourse should mirror that kind of love that Jesus had for us, sacrificial, exclusive, faithful. It is a kind of loving that is the most loving and the kind of loving that God wants to bring forth children from.
6. Sex only with your spouse
God’s plan of “sex only with your spouse” helps people to be role models of God’s special love.
Sexual intercourse in God’s plan is meant to be a special kind of loving that is exclusive and faithful.
So God’s plan has two rules (the Sixth and Ninth Commandment).
- Rule 1 – no sex outside of marriage. (Thou shalt not commit adultery)
- Rule 2 – fidelity in marriage. (Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s wife)
What is the purpose of God’s rules? To protect these important values. Why are these two rules important? Because they have the purpose of helping us live the way God wants us to as His sons and daughters being an image of the way He loves us.
A sexual relationship lived in the promise of permanency (marriage) prevents the collapse of sexual expression into being destructive, alienating, divisive, trivial or depressing.
If sexual intercourse does not follow God’s plan, then it is always more or less casual and trivial. (It is always casual and trivial for teenagers. They may not know this because of immaturity, but you and I as mature adults know this.) And it hurts them, at least one or both of them very badly and probably both. When a boy or girl says: “we had sex, but it didn’t mean anyone so everything’s OK”…that’s casual and trivial. That’s very hurtful.
7. How to use sex and get hurt or be hurt
How do people get hurt with sexual exchange?
They manipulate the feelings of the other to show control.
They use it to show they are liberated from restraints.
They use it to express a sexual rush.
They use it to make themselves feel a bit more loved, temporarily less insecure.
They use it to medicate their unhappiness.
They use it mask their loneliness.
They use it to express their anger at authority figures or life.
They use it for recreation.
They use it to get rid of depression.
They use it to relieve feelings of being alienated and not being appreciated.
Some people’s past is sometimes so bad that it generates a desperate need for nearness and closeness. Most of our kids tell us over and over again that when they have sex it does not lead to or create closeness or intimacy that lasts, but rather is intense for only a short time and then they feel just as before if not worse. They know from experience that in a world crying out in need of closeness and nearness that young people are likely to use genital sex as a self-defeating medicine or as a recreational drug.
This is not what God intended it to be and it makes it trivial and this trivial way of relating makes people unhappy, even more lonely and depressed.
We have all read in the paper and heard on the news that for young people in college, high school and junior high “the dating scene is dead” and it has been replaced by what many in the feminist movement across America have been touting, namely, casual sex as liberation, namely, casual sex disassociated from lasting emotion.
9. Our heart tells us avoid trivial relationships
When we look into the hearts of each one of us, the most profound thing we see in our heart is that each one of us wants truly to be known and appreciated as we really are deep down. We don’t just want people to know us on the surface. Yes, we want to be known deep down and we want to be loved, not just on the surface but deep down. Sexual relating that is called caring quite a bit for each other (high school) has nothing to do with our deepest desires. It makes our lives trivial. It makes us less happy, not more happy.
People try to convince girls that casual sex is as fulfilling for them as it is for boys. But many girls know that’s not true.
The media says the Christian ideal of friendship, family and marriage is repressive, hurtful and should be done away with. We know that’s not true. Many people try to convince high school kids that freedom from moral restraints is liberation and then we’ll really feel good if we have no sexual restraints. We know that’s not true.
The media tells us that a free sex life is empowerment for women. Most women know that’s not true.
The idea of the media is for you to be a bad girl and celebrate it, to become really comfortable being bad, happy with uncommitted sex.
Popular sex therapist, Roger Libby, who is a professor at the Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality in San Francisco, recommends PSD, namely, pre-sex discussion. It has nothing to do with honesty or courtship. It has something to do with increasing the pleasure of a non-committed casual relationship. What a sad thing that kid’s expectations are so low and so far from God’s purposes.
10. Girls gone mild
Wendy Shalit published Girls Gone Mild in 2007 with the idea that many young women and others are feeling the need to reclaim their self-respect and she says in her book how she was chastised by the media over and over again for writing this. Playboy called her book “a man’s worse nightmare.” The Nation said modesty is much worse than adultery. Isn’t that special! The New York Observer printed a front page mockup of Shalit as a SS Officer in a supposedly liberated age. They did not want us Christians to tell the truth of how young women are being hurt by this so-called liberation.
And yet Shalit said that about 70% of the hundreds of e-mails she received after writing the book were from young women saying she hit the nail on the head. She was right. She cited a 2006 study by the NIH which said among 19,000 teens, girls were four times more likely to be depressed if they experimented with sex and the depressive symptoms greatly increased as risky behavior increased. “The symptoms of depression,” the study said “included a loss of appetite, feelings of sadness, a loss of interest in areas in which they were previously interested and a hopeless feeling for the future.”
The Pacific Institute for Research in 2005 said “sex, drugs and alcohol among teens actually precede - and apparently lead to the onset of depression. This contradicts the common belief that depressed teens may be self-medicating through substance abuse and sex.”
In other words what Shalit is saying is backed by research yet people are trying to keep her quiet because she says: girls conforming to badness are ultimately less free and more oppressed than girls conforming to goodness.
11. Peer pressure leads to sex too often
In 2003 a study in the Journal of Sex Research found that male and female students “hook up” primarily because of peer pressure, not because they themselves are really comfortable with uncommitted sex. In other words, as Shalit says: badness requires more suppression of individual preferences than goodness ever did.
“As the old guides for young people make abundantly clear, the point of delaying gratification was precisely to preserve your individuality, preferences and goals – and your long-term happiness.”
12. What is pluralistic ignorance?
Why then do so many kids, especially girls, conform to uncommitted sex and do what they are told?
The phenomenon is called “pluralistic ignorance.” The girls are saying: “I don’t really like it, but other girls say they like it so I better pretend I do, too.” This is peer pressure.
It works like this: “Since the great majority of students do in fact hook up, it appears most students believe that others are comfortable (more comfortable than they are themselves) with engaging in a variety of uncommitted sexual behaviors.”
Consistent with “pluralistic ignorance” research, this study showed evidence of an illusion of universality. The students who didn’t feel so good about it failed to appreciate the extent to which others don’t feel so good either with hooking-up behaviors. That is, students wrongly assumed the attitudes of others about hooking up were more positive and unanimous than they actually were.
13. Young men believe nonsense
The 2003 study says: “Similar to other researchers, we found that men expressed greater comfort than did women with sexually intimate hooking-up behaviors. In the context of hooking up, this could lead to serious consequences.”
The study suggests that men believe women are more comfortable engaging in these behaviors than in fact they are.
Also women believe other women are more comfortable engaging in these behaviors than they are themselves.
As a consequence, some men may pressure women to engage in intimate sexual behaviors.
Some women may engage in these behaviors or resist only weakly because they believe they are unique in feeling discomfort about engaging in them.
14. How to help our boys and girls
Our boys have learned to groom girls with the nonsense that “If you do what I want you to do with me, I will love you a lot.”
Most boys know that’s not true, but some girls believe it.
In addition, many boys want girls to believe freedom from sexual boundaries will liberate them.
Many of our girls have been taught to believe that being bad or wild is empowering.
Many have been taught to believe friends with benefits is a great idea.
We have to teach them that is not so and we usually get a quick hearing with some of our boys and girls.
We have to stop allowing the use of the street words such as “hoe”, “slut”, “shanky”, “bitch”---“, etc.
Listen to what Professor Chyng Sun of New York University wrote in 2005:
“In my interviews, it was painful to hear how both teenage boys and girls feel pressured to have lots of sex, often emotionally detached, at a younger and younger age; and how so many young women feel obligated to please men sexually because they believed that it was their role as a woman. A twenty year-old female college student thought back to her teen years and said that often she felt that her body was not hers but was for others to look at and gain pleasure from. It is also alarming that many young men and boys have watched a lot of pornography before they have opportunities for sexual intimacy. Some developed a fear of women when they found that real women’s bodies were not as smooth and shaven and that real sex was nothing like the sex depicted in pornography. It is clear that pornography not only hurts women but also hurts men on many different levels.”
15. Girls fighting back
And yet, as Shalit points out, there is a growing number of young women who are fighting back and saying real liberation for young women and others is not simply conforming to what men say they want. And so many young women reject the idea of casual sex as liberation and they understand that pursuing crudeness is the problem for them. In the same way, the idea of young girls being aggressive and mean (“bitchy”) has, by this new group of young women, become not a mark of excellence, but a mark of decadence. What we need is a rebirth of a new decency and we here at Boys Town are just the ones to inculcate it with our young women.
We here at Boys Town start with helping our boys and girls learn reverence for males and females. Reverence means treating sexuality as it should be treated according to its own beauty and truth in God’s plan. Once we understand what God’s plan is for human sexuality then we teach the skills and build the relationships necessary to carry it out. We do this because the more skills we learn in such important areas and the more healthy relationships of friendship we build we will not only be happier ourselves, but bring happiness to others and to our society.
1. The purpose of human sexuality
So we ask what’s the purpose of human sexuality in God’s plan? We know everything has a purpose and every person has a purpose built in by God.
The purpose of a watch is to tell time. You can use it to prop a window open, but that’s a misuse of the watch.
The purpose of a knife is to cut things. You can put it in a flowerpot so a flower grows straight, but that’s a misuse of the knife.
The purpose of a pencil or a pen is to write. You can use a pencil or a pen to stab other persons, but that’s not its purpose. That’s a misuse.
The purpose of a wastebasket is to hold things. You can use a wastebasket to beat someone over the head with, but that’s a misuse of the wastebasket.
The purpose of human beings is union with God and others in God.
Our destination is heaven. And the purpose of human sexuality is to help us get there. Its purpose is: unitive and procreative.
2. An apprenticeship in self-mastery
So growing as boys and girls into adolescence and adulthood is an apprenticeship in self-mastery. It’s a training in being the kind of person God wants us to be. It’s a training in human freedom and responsibility. (So you can say no to your impulses. In this way, you can become free and responsible.) Our choices are clear as every boy or girl knows.
On one hand, we can be in charge of our impulses, in charge of our dreams, in charge of our hopes and find joy and happiness.
Or we can let ourselves be dominated by our anger, our loneliness or our passion or what the media tells us to do. Then we become very unhappy.
If we learn (slowly but surely) not to believe all the lies the media tells us, not to be simply blind followers to our impulses or blind to what the music tells us, the movies and the hood tells us then we will be the kind of persons we have often dreamed of. Perhaps our families have told us we will never be that good and wonderful kind of person. Perhaps we don’t even believe in ourselves. But we at Boys Town believe it. And we’re here to help you believe it too.
3. Self-mastery is a process
Learning the skills for self-mastery is a long process and it’s time to begin when you are young.
We hear every day stories about kids who are mean and cruel and nasty to each other. We also hear stories every day where boys rip off girls (and vice versa) by sweet talking and sex is often used to do that ripping off of the other.
And perhaps some of our boys and girls come from backgrounds where that was very true in their past. But here at Boys Town we have to learn God’s purpose for our lives, God’s purpose for our being male and female and how to be friends: a source of goodness, a source of happiness, a source of joy.
We live in a culture that is obsessed with sexuality and that’s sort of sad because it is easy to get trapped into empty or hurting relationships which are not nourishing and which aren’t humanizing and which don’t help us. We need to build a capacity for friendship which is the whole basis for all success in marriage and families.
4. What does Scripture say
In Genesis we read: “God created man in his own image…male and female He created them.” He blessed them and said “Be fruitful and multiply.” “When God created man, he made him in the likeness of God. Male and female, He created them and blessed them.”
In creating us male and female, God gives man and woman an equal personal dignity. Both are created in the image and likeness of the person of God. The male images God in a male way. And the female images God in a female way.
When God created us, He created everything good. God joined together sexual love, no matter what, with pro-creation. That is clear as a bell. The word pro-creation means to “create on behalf of God.”
How do we create babies on behalf of God? By bringing forth children inside of marriage, namely, inside of love no matter what (faithful, permanent love).
5. The Covenant of Marriage and the Covenant of Redemption
In God’s plan, children are to come from a union of husband and wife in love no matter what.
This is the unitive and pro-creative purposes of marriage.
In this way, children have the best chance to grow up healthy and happy and everyone admits that.
This is called the covenant of creation. (God’s commitment to continue the human race: God’s command to only create children in a union of love no matter what.)
There is also the covenant of redemption (God’s commitment to take away our sins, give us grace to fulfill the mission God has set us on and open heaven to us).
This is the covenant of Jesus being exclusively faithful, sacrificial and loving us no matter what on the cross so we could fulfill our mission and enter heaven.
That’s the sacrificial faithful love of husband and wife.
St. Paul tells us that sexual intercourse should mirror that kind of love that Jesus had for us, sacrificial, exclusive, faithful. It is a kind of loving that is the most loving and the kind of loving that God wants to bring forth children from.
6. Sex only with your spouse
God’s plan of “sex only with your spouse” helps people to be role models of God’s special love.
Sexual intercourse in God’s plan is meant to be a special kind of loving that is exclusive and faithful.
So God’s plan has two rules (the Sixth and Ninth Commandment).
- Rule 1 – no sex outside of marriage. (Thou shalt not commit adultery)
- Rule 2 – fidelity in marriage. (Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s wife)
What is the purpose of God’s rules? To protect these important values. Why are these two rules important? Because they have the purpose of helping us live the way God wants us to as His sons and daughters being an image of the way He loves us.
A sexual relationship lived in the promise of permanency (marriage) prevents the collapse of sexual expression into being destructive, alienating, divisive, trivial or depressing.
If sexual intercourse does not follow God’s plan, then it is always more or less casual and trivial. (It is always casual and trivial for teenagers. They may not know this because of immaturity, but you and I as mature adults know this.) And it hurts them, at least one or both of them very badly and probably both. When a boy or girl says: “we had sex, but it didn’t mean anyone so everything’s OK”…that’s casual and trivial. That’s very hurtful.
7. How to use sex and get hurt or be hurt
How do people get hurt with sexual exchange?
They manipulate the feelings of the other to show control.
They use it to show they are liberated from restraints.
They use it to express a sexual rush.
They use it to make themselves feel a bit more loved, temporarily less insecure.
They use it to medicate their unhappiness.
They use it mask their loneliness.
They use it to express their anger at authority figures or life.
They use it for recreation.
They use it to get rid of depression.
They use it to relieve feelings of being alienated and not being appreciated.
Some people’s past is sometimes so bad that it generates a desperate need for nearness and closeness. Most of our kids tell us over and over again that when they have sex it does not lead to or create closeness or intimacy that lasts, but rather is intense for only a short time and then they feel just as before if not worse. They know from experience that in a world crying out in need of closeness and nearness that young people are likely to use genital sex as a self-defeating medicine or as a recreational drug.
This is not what God intended it to be and it makes it trivial and this trivial way of relating makes people unhappy, even more lonely and depressed.
We have all read in the paper and heard on the news that for young people in college, high school and junior high “the dating scene is dead” and it has been replaced by what many in the feminist movement across America have been touting, namely, casual sex as liberation, namely, casual sex disassociated from lasting emotion.
9. Our heart tells us avoid trivial relationships
When we look into the hearts of each one of us, the most profound thing we see in our heart is that each one of us wants truly to be known and appreciated as we really are deep down. We don’t just want people to know us on the surface. Yes, we want to be known deep down and we want to be loved, not just on the surface but deep down. Sexual relating that is called caring quite a bit for each other (high school) has nothing to do with our deepest desires. It makes our lives trivial. It makes us less happy, not more happy.
People try to convince girls that casual sex is as fulfilling for them as it is for boys. But many girls know that’s not true.
The media says the Christian ideal of friendship, family and marriage is repressive, hurtful and should be done away with. We know that’s not true. Many people try to convince high school kids that freedom from moral restraints is liberation and then we’ll really feel good if we have no sexual restraints. We know that’s not true.
The media tells us that a free sex life is empowerment for women. Most women know that’s not true.
The idea of the media is for you to be a bad girl and celebrate it, to become really comfortable being bad, happy with uncommitted sex.
Popular sex therapist, Roger Libby, who is a professor at the Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality in San Francisco, recommends PSD, namely, pre-sex discussion. It has nothing to do with honesty or courtship. It has something to do with increasing the pleasure of a non-committed casual relationship. What a sad thing that kid’s expectations are so low and so far from God’s purposes.
10. Girls gone mild
Wendy Shalit published Girls Gone Mild in 2007 with the idea that many young women and others are feeling the need to reclaim their self-respect and she says in her book how she was chastised by the media over and over again for writing this. Playboy called her book “a man’s worse nightmare.” The Nation said modesty is much worse than adultery. Isn’t that special! The New York Observer printed a front page mockup of Shalit as a SS Officer in a supposedly liberated age. They did not want us Christians to tell the truth of how young women are being hurt by this so-called liberation.
And yet Shalit said that about 70% of the hundreds of e-mails she received after writing the book were from young women saying she hit the nail on the head. She was right. She cited a 2006 study by the NIH which said among 19,000 teens, girls were four times more likely to be depressed if they experimented with sex and the depressive symptoms greatly increased as risky behavior increased. “The symptoms of depression,” the study said “included a loss of appetite, feelings of sadness, a loss of interest in areas in which they were previously interested and a hopeless feeling for the future.”
The Pacific Institute for Research in 2005 said “sex, drugs and alcohol among teens actually precede - and apparently lead to the onset of depression. This contradicts the common belief that depressed teens may be self-medicating through substance abuse and sex.”
In other words what Shalit is saying is backed by research yet people are trying to keep her quiet because she says: girls conforming to badness are ultimately less free and more oppressed than girls conforming to goodness.
11. Peer pressure leads to sex too often
In 2003 a study in the Journal of Sex Research found that male and female students “hook up” primarily because of peer pressure, not because they themselves are really comfortable with uncommitted sex. In other words, as Shalit says: badness requires more suppression of individual preferences than goodness ever did.
“As the old guides for young people make abundantly clear, the point of delaying gratification was precisely to preserve your individuality, preferences and goals – and your long-term happiness.”
12. What is pluralistic ignorance?
Why then do so many kids, especially girls, conform to uncommitted sex and do what they are told?
The phenomenon is called “pluralistic ignorance.” The girls are saying: “I don’t really like it, but other girls say they like it so I better pretend I do, too.” This is peer pressure.
It works like this: “Since the great majority of students do in fact hook up, it appears most students believe that others are comfortable (more comfortable than they are themselves) with engaging in a variety of uncommitted sexual behaviors.”
Consistent with “pluralistic ignorance” research, this study showed evidence of an illusion of universality. The students who didn’t feel so good about it failed to appreciate the extent to which others don’t feel so good either with hooking-up behaviors. That is, students wrongly assumed the attitudes of others about hooking up were more positive and unanimous than they actually were.
13. Young men believe nonsense
The 2003 study says: “Similar to other researchers, we found that men expressed greater comfort than did women with sexually intimate hooking-up behaviors. In the context of hooking up, this could lead to serious consequences.”
The study suggests that men believe women are more comfortable engaging in these behaviors than in fact they are.
Also women believe other women are more comfortable engaging in these behaviors than they are themselves.
As a consequence, some men may pressure women to engage in intimate sexual behaviors.
Some women may engage in these behaviors or resist only weakly because they believe they are unique in feeling discomfort about engaging in them.
14. How to help our boys and girls
Our boys have learned to groom girls with the nonsense that “If you do what I want you to do with me, I will love you a lot.”
Most boys know that’s not true, but some girls believe it.
In addition, many boys want girls to believe freedom from sexual boundaries will liberate them.
Many of our girls have been taught to believe that being bad or wild is empowering.
Many have been taught to believe friends with benefits is a great idea.
We have to teach them that is not so and we usually get a quick hearing with some of our boys and girls.
We have to stop allowing the use of the street words such as “hoe”, “slut”, “shanky”, “bitch”---“, etc.
Listen to what Professor Chyng Sun of New York University wrote in 2005:
“In my interviews, it was painful to hear how both teenage boys and girls feel pressured to have lots of sex, often emotionally detached, at a younger and younger age; and how so many young women feel obligated to please men sexually because they believed that it was their role as a woman. A twenty year-old female college student thought back to her teen years and said that often she felt that her body was not hers but was for others to look at and gain pleasure from. It is also alarming that many young men and boys have watched a lot of pornography before they have opportunities for sexual intimacy. Some developed a fear of women when they found that real women’s bodies were not as smooth and shaven and that real sex was nothing like the sex depicted in pornography. It is clear that pornography not only hurts women but also hurts men on many different levels.”
15. Girls fighting back
And yet, as Shalit points out, there is a growing number of young women who are fighting back and saying real liberation for young women and others is not simply conforming to what men say they want. And so many young women reject the idea of casual sex as liberation and they understand that pursuing crudeness is the problem for them. In the same way, the idea of young girls being aggressive and mean (“bitchy”) has, by this new group of young women, become not a mark of excellence, but a mark of decadence. What we need is a rebirth of a new decency and we here at Boys Town are just the ones to inculcate it with our young women.
posted by Fr. Peter | 3:22 PM
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